Who Am I?

That is the question we all ask ourselves at least once in a lifetime. For me it has been the driving question that has fueled my life. I've come a long way on the journey to answering that question and have discovered that one can never come up with a complete answer because we are always constantly growing and changing and becoming. I have, in the mean time, come to understand that we really do create our reality with our thoughts, beliefs and feelings.

I am known to most as Jenny or Astartiel. I was almost named Guinevere Sunshine or Guinevere Springtime but my Mom got talked into the more traditional Jennifer Susan instead. Guinevere has always felt more like my name to me though. Astartiel is my online name for myself. And lately I've taken up the last name Hempstead (was my great-grandmother's last name) as my poetry name, pseudonym & nom de plume, both off and online. If I ever publish or direct films, I'm considering using Guinevere Hempstead as my name. This website is an attempt to group my many diverse interests & ideas together in a useful, amusing & creative way. I hope you enjoy traversing these interests & pages with me.

In my 30+ years, who have I become? I'm very different than most women out there, imho. I'm a very independent thinker & an artistic soul. I am a Poet, Singer, Writer, Photographer, Future Filmmaker (Film Director, Editor, Cinematographer, etc) - I hope, Computer Tech, New Ager, Daughter, Mother, Sister, Friend, & Lover, among other things. I am into many alternative things such as Reiki, EFT, Tarot, Numerology, Crystals, Reality Creation, The Secret (The Law of Attraction), Philosophy, Spirituality (but NOT religion of any kind), Science, Technology, Science Fiction, Fantasy, and so on. I'm into New Age, Paranormal, Science, History, Science Fiction & Fantasy books, websites, tv & movies. Favorite authors include Robert Heinlein, Frank Herbert, JRR Tolkien, JK Rowling, Anne Rice, Stephenie Meyer, Stephen King & Terry Goodkind, to name just a few. I once wanted to be a Bene Gesserit Fremen Reverend Mother (from Frank Herbert's Dune books). Part of me still does.

I am mostly all about my daughter Aurora - playing with her, teaching her, watching her grow up, and showing her & helping her to explore and discover this world in all it's wonder and magnificence! Now that I have become a mother, I have been exploring what motherhood means to me & what it means to raise a child. My daughter has been both the biggest challenge & most wonderful adventure I've had in my life so far. She is the cutest & smartest little girl in the world, as far as I'm concerned, and the light of my life.

For way too long now (almost a decade), I've had a major (possibly chronic & debilitating) crush on the actor/artist/poet/photographer/performer Viggo Mortensen. Whatever I do & whatever he does, I can't get over this man. I've tried many remedies for getting over the sickness of loving Viggo from afar but so far to no avail. I'm so into Viggo, that I even have a not so "private" Viggo Blog called "My Love of Viggo" on this website. Mostly it's just me saying what I would like to say to Viggo if I could...

More About Me:

According to Myers-Brigg's, I am an Idealist INFP. Supposedly my type of personality makes up only about 8-10% of the population, or perhaps even less. I suppose that explains alot about why I've never felt like I "fit in."

For much of my life so far I have been a student, through grade school, high school, college and beyond. Now I am a student of life & existance. It is just in the last few years that I have grown to feel like my life has started happening beyond instruction & study. Hopefully, with the help of Reiki, EFT & The Secret, I can soon begin manifesting some of what I want in life, using what I've learned, in a pleasing & beneficial way for all concerned.

Some of my main life interests are filmmaking, watching movies, watching Sci Fi tv shows, writing poetry & music, singing, photography, learning topics such as: new age, self-improvement, fantasy, philosophy, mythology, science, history, the world, & the universe. I'm also very fond of the secret, reality creation, reiki, eft, kaos magick, tai chi, dancing, and exploring & communing with Mother Nature. I possess around a hundred different kinds of crystals, which I use to decorate and beautify my surroundings. My walls are covered in positive sayings, affirmations, fine art prints, family photos and both my Daughter's and Mother's artwork.

I am very much a thinker more than a doer. Some people say I think too much. Sometimes my thinking so much about things gets in the way of my taking action. Someday I hope to find a balance between thought & action in my life, especially in regards to my career goals. If only I could get paid for just thinking & dreaming, lol...

For a long time now I've been searching for answers to & meanings for and of life. I I've started to figure alot of this out. And I have learned a few things about living a good life and being a decent person, along the way. I just hope I can use what I've learned to make my life, into the life of my dreams.

My Interests:

50-100% dark chocolate, afterlife, architecture, art, astral projection, beaches, beauty, beliefs create reailty, bicycling, blood, chaos magick, chocolate, comedy, computer games, computers, create reality, creating reality, creativity, crystals, dark chocolate, deep thoughts, deep thinking, dogma, dune, earl gray tea, everquest, fantasy, filmmaking, finding neverland, future lives, galaxies, harry potter, herbal medicine, high tech toys, higher-self, hiking, ideal realities, imagination, independent filmmaking, indian food, jane roberts, journals, laughter, lestat, lexx, lord of the rings, love, lucid dreaming, make-believe, medicine cards, metaphysics, monty python, motivation, mysticism, music, nature, neverland, new age, new experiences, non-muggles, numerology, oceans, once upon a time, organic food, other cultures, parallel universes, paranormal, past lives, peace, peter pan, photography, playing, poetry, quantum physics, questioning, reading, reality creation, reincarnation, runes, sci-fi, science, science fiction, self help, seth books, shakespeare, singing, songwriting, space, space travel, spicy food, star trek, star wars, stargate sg-1, sumari, supernatural, swords, tarot, technology, the hidden world, the holographic universe, the matrix, theatre, thinking, thought-provoking conversation, thoughts become things, thoughts create reality, travel, ufo's, vampires, viggo mortensen, witches, wizards, web browsing, wonder, world music, writing, ycyor, yerba maté, etc...

Favorite Authors: Robert A. Heinlein, Anne Rice, Stephenie Meyer, Frank Herbert, Terry Goodkind, Stephen King, J.R.R. Tolkien, JK Rowling, Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, Jane Roberts (Seth), Douglas Adams, Rhonda Byrne, Esther Hicks, etc...

Favorite Bands/Music: 50's/60's/70/90's Rock'N'Roll, Classical music, 20's-30's music, Indian (Tamil/Hindi) music, Native American music, Arabic music, Disney songs, Mozart, Dr. Demento, The Beatles, The Doors, The Mamas & The Papas, Jethro Tull, Creed, Madonna, Weird Al, James Taylor, Styx, Ricky Martin, Jewel, Iron Maiden, Portishead, Viggo Mortensen, Bob Dylan, Cat Stevens, Sting, Bell Book & Candle, Eagles, John Cafferty & BBB, Enya, Bob Marley, Peter Paul & Mary, AC/DC, CCR, Smashmouth, Gypsy Kings, Bing Crosby, Janis Joplin, Bob Dylan, Billy Joel, Donovan, Jefferson Airplane, Led Zeppelin, Asp, Lisa Loeb, Kansas, Queen, Bare Naked Ladies, REM, Joan Jett, The Who, Eric Clapton, Sugar Ray, The Platters, U2, Jimi Hendrix, Billy Joel, Goo Goo Dolls, Van Morrison, Frank Sinatra, Dead Can Dance, Neil Young, Harry Chapin, Selena, Eric Clapton, Frank Zappa, Seal, Harry Nilsson, Jerry Lee Lewis, Ricky Nelson, Jim Croce, Spice Girls, Blues Traveler, Steppenwolf, The Byrds, Will Smith, Meatloaf, Rolling Stones ...just to name a few.

On my username Astartiel:

Often as you browse these pages you will see my username Astartiel (and previously Astartae and Astartaelon). Since many people have asked why I choose those usernames I thought I would let you know here.

My choosing of those names started when I was a junior in high school. In my English class we were learning about poetry. I was also really into reading the Seth books by Jane Roberts at the time. One of the poems I wrote at this time was just gibberish words, a 'Sumari' poem (from the Seth books). As you can see, when I wrote my poem one of the "words" was 'Astare':

Isoulé intrasté alambra
Milmumet Sumari
For darambi tol
Arado fromabé
Marjor astaré!

My soul sings...
I speak words
And syllables
Re-arrange my worlds.
And I am one with the stars!

Several years later while reading a book on mythology I read about a goddess name 'Astarte' (notice different spelling). That book said Astarte was a creation goddess who supposedly created the other gods and goddesses. Later I read more about this goddess and found out she had other origins in Mesopotamia and Egypt. I have read her as being a goddess of both love and war at the same time. I've also read that she has connections with Ishtar, Isis and Venus/Aphrodite in myth.

As I started using the username Astarte, I often found that other people had taken that name, espeically at new age websites. So I changed the spelling of the name for my purposes to Astartae. And I like that spelling better because it changes the pronunciation from uh-star-tee to uh-star-tay, which sounds better to my ears. I also recently learned that Astartae is the plural form of Astarte. That makes me like the username even more. I also use the names Astartaelon and Astartiel, the only one who uses those, as far as I know.

As far as I know, I'm the first person on the internet who used the name Astartae but recently I've noticed other people using it. There is a woman on AOL who uses the name and someone who plays Dark Ages of Camelot who uses the name. Neither of them are me. I am also not the plant of the same name. I do use ezboard and livejournal and I did used to have a website at saber.net (which is now this site). I also sometimes find my way to Lexx and Seth (Jane Roberts) sites and into the world of Norrath of EverQuest.

For the last few years I have been using Astartiel, as another version of Astarte. It is fun to change my username just slightly now and again. And it's nice to have a more unique username once again as well. And I've grown comfortable with this new online version of myself.

I hope you enjoyed reading about me. Now why don't you venture on and read some of my poetry.

whispers
By Guinevere Hempstead
For Viggo Mortensen

your soul speaks to me
in whispers
soft, still waters
that lap at my shore
teasing me
with sweet, fragrant tones
that echo
in my mind and soul
soft, round flavors
fill me
from your whispers
leaving me wanting
for more

-----------

Sign My Guestbook

Donations